Sweden. Home?

Speaking of Sweden and “home” I cant help of wonder if i ever will move back. It feels further and further away, all things that is normal here now, and how i dont really feel connected to what is going on back in Sweden anymore. I check the news online, and sometimes ask my mum what that was about, if it is something i dont really get. But more then that, i dont have a clue really. I dont know the Tv shows, i dont know the music, i dont even know the grade system i schools anymore. Im pretty sure it changed since i lived home.

I was the ONLY one i know ( in the UK) that cared about the fact that Sweden won the Ice hockey World Championships this year. Everyone looked at me like i was crazy when i screamed in the pub.  “What have Sweden won?”  that And this is in less then 5 years. How will it be to go back after 10?

Well, I dont think it will happen, but i still, makes me think sometimes… and what would i do back home? Buy a house and, eeeeerr, work where? Na, I stay here for a long time. London gets stuck with you, and also, D only knows 3 words in Swedish. He wont learn more…

 

Lots of nonsense…

Im back. I took a break yesterday. From Life. I felt so sick and was half alive the whole day, and D happily said when we left the house just to get some food “Oh, this is not often, but i look much better then you!” and gave me a big grin. Great, thank you baby…  

I got some good news, but i dont want to jinx things, so i will write it here when i feel more sure. Hope that is ok.. However a bit overwhelmed and very happy. If you dont count the fact that i managed to get sick and still is feeling bad. Right after the neck got better, some bug got me. Whyyyyyy, oh why? 

So, that means no gym for me today, but i will get back as soon as i can. Last week was a failure, between sick, neck pain and interviews, i only got to the gym one time. ONE TIME. That wont make me fit. Back tomorrow if i take it slow today and just get well. 

In my homeland it has started to get  very cold and the autumn/winter has started for real. This is normally the time when i get very happy by being in the UK. Winter is not that cold here. Autumn is more like late summer. Today 18 degrees and looking lovely. ( to bad for me that im still stuck in bed) hopefully this winter wont be as cold as last, when it was actually snowing in beginning of April. In UK? This can not happen this year… it wont, will it?

Saturday morning.

And I’m running out of the door to go for a interview… Wish me luck. D is looking at American dad and I don’t want to leave… all right see you down in central. Oxford circus is where I have to go… That is not the best place to be on a Saturday… Mental and so busy.

Hahaha…i this… so good. And he has a point:

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5:2 Diet. Again.

Is EVERY Swede doing this diet? And have everyone lost there mind? Oh yes, Lets not eat ANYTHING for two days, and then go crazy the other days. Yes, great idea!!

Honestly, I know i can seem a bit obsessed when you read this blog, but im not plannig on starving myself 2 days. Period.

As i have written in another post about 5:2 diet i have tried and i dont think, for someone that is on a healthy weight, that this will give many benefits… if you need to loose a lot for your HEALTH and you need a kick start.. yes, this could be good.

But please dear homeland, EVERY day in magazines there is a new recipe and a new way to “get thru the fasting days” i cant even stand to read it.

That was me mad about this. Have a great day all of you, and i hope you have breakfast, lunch, dinner, a healthy snack today, even a glass of wine or two! It is Friday after all.

Fitting-room panic… and how to move on.

Hmmm.. I dont know if you will attack me on Whats app ( the ones that have me there) or even in comments… but im going to write it anyway.

For those that remember, around a week ago i wrote that i felt that i got somewhere with the gym and that i started feeling stronger and a bit more fit. This is before i,  a bit in panic, needed to go into a fitting room before a interview and change my outfit and also try on some stuff. That ruined my feeling of being on the way and since then i have been struggling with feeling good about gym or general health. “what does it matter? in the fitting room i look like shit anyway, my thighs are bigger then ever and also most probably so is my tummy” Now, i know there is many logical reasons why i should not feel this way, and also many wrong thoughts that made me end up there, but hey, this is the way it is right now.

So, never quit and never give up.

For those who knows me from a work perspective, knows that i dont EVER give up, i work very very hard, and always push thru. Always. Even when i feel like there is no chance to reach the targets, or when the team are not working out, when the store is literally raining into, then i DONT give up. And i have a Cv to show for it. And im very happy with that, as well as im even a bit proud over it.

BUT.

That damn fitting-room, it really made me feel down about myself. So now i will get over that, and the solution is to not go into a fitting-room in a long time (not the best way, i know, but dont come with,face your fears bs, please) and go to the gym. Work my ass off literally.

Wish me luck. #abitsadaboutthatfittingroom